Thread: She hit me like a fire truck with her smile!

I just moved from California to Indiana in the summer of 2011, so I joined Match.com to meet new people and see of I clicked with anyone. I was on match.com one evening and a BW contacted me, which really was a first... I dated an Asian Pacific island girl once, but never a black women. Not because I'm partial in anyway, rather simply because of timing... I tend to enjoy long stable relationships, so I'm rarely available. I've just never been available to date anyone outside me race before when the timing was right.

...But, she caught my attention! She has a Phd for crying out loud! This sort of weighed in my mind however, as I only have a couple of AAS degree's, but I did have a 20 year Air-force career, and have had a seriously adventurous life! I had dated a few women from Match and was really busy in my life when our conversation first began, so we lost touch for a while. I remember thinking to myself, how could this highly educated Black woman be attracted to me? I remember mulling this over in my mind...a lot actually. After about a month of not being on match, I logged back in and updated my profile, and there she was again, wanting to resume the conversation we had started. The timing was right...

Over the preceding month I figured out that I was being dumb trying to convince myself why she should NOT be attracted to me, and accepted the fact that she was! She has the book smarts, and I have the combat time adventures world experience... and some book smarts. I was most intimidated by her PHd... Do I really have the ability to engage her at her level of intellect???? I certainly am not looking for a short term fling, but can I keep her engaged for a life time? These were some of the questions spinning in my mind...

I finally got my courage and asked her for a dinner date, and she immediately said yes. I just remember thinking this is so unreal... on the evening of our date I arrive at the cafe about 3 hours early... I did not want be late! The cafe had a sports bar attached, so I was able to watch the IU vs Kentucky BB game. This extra time allowed me to study the menu and get comfortable with the surroundings so I could relax, and really be me. I swear I was more nervous to meet her then an Afghanistan warrior on a battle field! I could have have lost my life in the war, sure... but this woman might actually steal my soul...

The time to meet her came and went, and I was pacing by the front window inside the cafe like a little puppy at the pet store. Then, I started thinking I'd been stood up, and self doubt came roaring into my mind...geezzzeeeesss... I waited, 5 minutes, 10 minutes...15 minutes... I was really feeling down... but I looked up and there she was, outside on the sidewalk in the cold December night. We made eye contact, and I saw her warm smile; it hit me like a truck. I will never forget the vision of a beautiful woman in the window on a cold December night. It's a permanent retinal burn!

It was a wonderful evening and the conversation flowed like water in a river... suddenly 2.5 hours had passed, and our date reached its natural conclusion. So there we were standing on the walk outside the cafe, ready to part ways. I told her I had a wonderful time, and that I'd enjoy seeing her again sometime, and she said yes, and she said yes, and she said yes, and she said yes, and she said YES!!!!! Yea, I know that's how I heard is too, over and over again! We hugged and I got a kiss on the cheek...

I had to fight the desire to escort her to her car... I know she is a grown woman; she is capable of taking care of herself. Also, I was not sure about what to do!!! I thought that a woman on a 1st date may NOT want a strange man to actually walk with her to her car.... so I opted to part ways with her at the door. But I did peak back at her as she was walking away, and I swear it was a type of swaying walk like she was walking on cloud 9... DID I DO THAT..to her? I guess I did... I guess I did....

We've been talking daily ever since that night... I went onto Match and took down my profile a couple of weeks ago, but did not tell her I was going to do this. After a few days she noticed it was gone, and so I sent her an email telling her that I did not want other distractions in my life from this road I'm now apparently walking on. I told her I really want to see where this road might go. She mentioned that when she saw my profile was gone, she was silently happy to herself, and best of all, she mentioned she felt the exact same way.

Our 2nd date is tomorrow afternoon and evening. Movie and dinner! We both traveled extensively over the holiday to see family scattered about the globe. I found her a little gift in my travels that I wanted to give her. Something that she can use, and that will remind her of this moment in her/our life. I mentioned I got her a little something, and she replied that she had too. hahaha.... So that is where I am in life at the moment... I would say that I'm falling in love, but I don't know... Perhaps that first smile she flashed me already drown me in that ocean, and now I'm just sinking deeper.

So I hope this rather short post will encourage at least one person out there contemplating an IR, to have no fear! You start a relationship with 0% of the women you never have the courage to ask out... your odds only go up from this point!
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